In which Jenny Lawson comes to Cedar Rapids and I give her a hug and knitted reproductive systems.

On 7/8/2016, Tom, my friends and I got to meet our favorite author. We were almost last in line (on purpose; see also: anxiety issues) and got to get our books signed, and talk with Jenny. Tom got his Rory card signed and I gave Jenny the Knitted Knaughties. If you don’t know about these, you’ll have to put that in my search box and enjoy a really good story about Jenny matchmaking me (in Iowa) and Louise (in New Zealand; see also: possible place to move if Trump becomes President, because if so, I’m Audi, dude) to come up with a knitted vagina and penis to show women where to find their clitoris in a totally non-skeevy way. Seriously; some women have to be shown. My sons learned a lot from this pair, and to their future wives, I say, “You. Are. Welcome.”

That was kind of a long stream of consciousness type of ramble, and I blame my phone. So I’ll just tack on the pictures and call it good. 

Yesterday, I worked from 10am-11pm on my website. I went to bed and couldn't sleep so I got back up and worked from 12am-3:30am. Still couldn't sleep until around 6am. I've gotten ZILCH done today (I did manage to shower, brush my teeth, and put on clean clothes) and I'm almost okay with that.
Jenny doing a totally kick-ass reading

Jenny and Tom
Jenny and Tom

Jenny accepting the adoption of the Knitted Knaughties
Jenny accepting the adoption of the Knitted Knaughties

Jenny and I and the Knitted Knaughties
Jenny and I and the Knitted Knaughties
Jenny combining a couple of her gifts so things could get even weirder, if possible
Jenny combining a couple of her gifts so things could get even weirder, if possible
Jenny and Kenzie  conversing intently
Jenny and Kenzie conversing intently
Jenny and Kenzie
Jenny and Kenzie

And they all checked one thing off their bucket list and lived happily ever after. Amen.

GisT 5×365

Wage a Battle Against Embitterment With Schmutzie’s 365 Days of Grace in Small Things
  1. Being so busy at work that I don’t have time to write (trying to see the silver lining, mah peepull)
  2. Snowflakes that are so big and fat and sparkly that it looks like movie snow
  3. A rough night at work making me feel more competent
  4. Breaking a streak of insomnia
  5. Staying in bed and watching a movie on my laptop

GisT 4×365

Wage a Battle Against Embitterment With Schmutzie’s 365 Days of Grace in Small Things
  1. Campbell’s chicken noodle soup and saltine crackers
  2. A kind offer to start my car ten minutes before my shift was over so I could get into a toasty, defrosted heatmobile
  3. Yummy new music from iTunes (with thanks to Dad/Mom– I used my birfday money!)
  4. A new color of nail polish (if inquiring minds want to know, it’s Avon Cherry Jubilee and I totally fuzzy-with-little-pompoms HEART it)
  5. Making it four days without a cigarette, including the trigger-happy and wrought with danger First Smokefree Shift at Work AND car ride there and back; which I did indeed survive both successfully AND unscathed

GisT 3×365

Wage a Battle Against Embitterment With Schmutzie’s 365 Days of Grace in Small Things
  1. Giving all my plants a good spray down in the sink, and the smell reminds me of spring
  2. Getting and putting up a grow light for the zebra plant I almost committed plantslaughter against
  3. Fuzzy slippers
  4. Removing cobwebs from corners
  5. Watching my son blow bubbles and my dog try to catch every single one

GisT 1×365

Wage a Battle Against Embitterment With Schmutzie’s 365 Days of Grace in Small Things

Let’s kick off GisT ’10!

  1. All of the well wishes for a fabulous 2010 all over Twitter and Facebook
  2. A day I don’t have to leave the house; my agenda lists laying on the couch watching Friends on DVD and writing a couple blog posts
  3. The satisfaction of finishing another section of my quilt and leaning back and admiring how the pieces look together
  4. Sleeping with Tom the whole night long
  5. My son’s new deep voice

Grace in Small Things 12×365

Wage a Battle Against Embitterment With Schmutzie’s 365 Days of Grace in Small Things

I was trying to come up with something to write about and realized somehow I abandoned Grace in Small Things. Well, sort of. I didn’t mean to, but I quit writing GiST posts; but I do actively look for small blessings as I go through my day. Life gets better when you’re cruising through and seeking for something to be grateful.

My plan: GiST here today picking up where I left on with number 12, then start over fresh on January 1st. So here we go!

  1. Chocolate Raspberry cocoa mix in my morning coffee
  2. Feeling Emma (my small, snotty cheerleader bitch of a cat) purr
  3. A full, hour-long body massage from my bestest friend
  4. Burger King double cheeseburger with ketchup, lettuce, and mayo
  5. A Monopoly game with the guys at my shelter

Grace in Small Things 11×365

  1. I haven’t been actually blogging GiST posts as much as I want to. Life happens. But let me just give you one observation that I’ve made. I’ve noticed that every day I look for Grace in Small Things. The motivation started just because I wanted something interesting in my GiST lists instead of same ol’ same ol’ stuff. But then I noticed that I am actively looking for small blessings as I go through my day. Life gets better when you’re cruising through and seeking for something to be grateful.
  2. This new job. It’s lots of hours and it’s overnights– boo. But I can get my online stuff done– answering email, dropping Entrecards, writing posts, reading blogs and commenting, while it’s quiet here and I don’t feel guilty about it like I did when I was doing it at home. YAY! Also, as corny as it sounds, it’s more than just a job. I feel like I’m making a difference in someone’s life at the time they need it most.
  3. I got my first check from the shelter and I feel useful again.
  4. After a couple days of fitful, restless daytime sleep, Hunky got me a sleep mask. What an amazing difference it makes! Last week after I came through 8 straight overnights, most of them 12 hour shifts, I exhausted myself enough to hibernate. I slept for 12 hours straight! When I woke up, I felt like what I imagine a mama bear coming out of a cave for the first time in the spring would feel like.
  5. My iPhone died, Hunky took it to the at&t store, and it was the last day we would have been able to trade it in for a new one on the spot. If we had come in the next day, we would have had to mess with sending it back to Apple and Apple sending us a new one, leaving me without a phone for a few days. YAY!