Obligatory Thanksgiving message. Happy Eat Like An Asshole and Pass Out Before Dishes are Done Day.

We did not coordinate outfits beforehand. We each came out of our rooms and went, “Dooooood. Niiiiiiice.”
Oh mah dam but he’s handsome! (Never mind I’m a tad biased.) He’s single, ladies! (Must not be a drama queen, a player, or a doosh. Extra points if you sign.)
He’s such a handsome devil.
Oh mah love. My person.
Elli & Erin are VERY excited to go to Gramma’s.
Happy Thanksgiving from me and mine to you and yours!

And sometimes, the grasshopper becomes the teacher.

Before Tom left for work this morning, he mentioned that he wanted more stuff removed from the basement. In particular, the 5 55 gallon bags of cans and bottles, and all the stuff I’ve boxed up to go to Goodwill.

So, I gave Mika the task of putting the cans and bottles in the car while I took a shower, then I planned on taking them to The Can Shed.

Now, a note on our vehicle situation. He has a Chrysler LHS which is almost the size of a yacht. I drive a two door Saturn, which is roughly the size of a large dog. I thought Tom took his bike and left his car, leaving two cars in the driveway.

When I instructed Mika to put 5 55 gallon bags full of cans and bottles in the car, I thought the LHS was here. It wasn’t. So while I was in the shower, Mika looked outside, saw my tiny car, and thought, ok, Mom said to do it, so I will. And he did. He fit all those cans and bottles in my teeny weeny clown car. He didn’t think, ok, Mom said do it, but that’s impossible. She must be drunk again. I’ll talk to her about it when she sobers up.

If Tom had told me to fit all that in my car, I would’ve said, “No way. I’ve only been able to fit two can bags in there before.”

But my boy thought, Mom said do it, so there must be a way.

So I took off. I couldn’t see in my rear view mirror, but that’s only slightly illegal. But I used my side mirrors carefully and arrived safely. You should have seen the guy that was parked next to me at The Can Shed as I unloaded. His face was priceless. I just kept pulling one bag after another out of that car and his eyes just kept on getting bigger.

And I walked out with $50 to buy tents to take my boys camping.

I’m so proud of Mika. He taught me something today.

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Let NaBloPoMo commence (plus a video for Aunts & Uncles and Grammas & Grampas)

For those of you not familiar with NaBloPoMo, bloggers can join each other in writing every day in November. (See also: NaNoWriMo.)

I thought and thought all day about what to write about, but I’m kinda stuck. I think I’ve forgotten how.

In hoping to distract you from my writer’s block, I throw other gunk at you.

*thwack* (that was the gunk hitting the wall.)

So you get pictures and a video from Mika’s first band concert.

*choruses of “You Suck!” and “UNFOLLOW!” and “UNSUBSCRIBE” ring out*

Sorry.

There’s always tomorrow.

Well, until 11-30, anyway.


And this was his favorite piece of music they performed. Brought back fond memories of marching and pep band.

Who’s going to soundproof my basement?

As if it wasn’t noisy enough around here with Zaya playing drums, now Mika has decided he wants to play the tuba!

Last spring when the 5th graders were offered band instruments, he came home and said the only thing he would be allowed to play was the flute, and wasn’t really enthused about the situation. Sorry to be stereotypical, but a dude playing the flute? I couldn’t blame him. The only dude I know who can pull that off is James Galway. I thought Mika was a trumpet or sax kinda kid. So it looked like Mika wouldn’t be in band. I was seriously bummed out.

And? I feel it extremely necessary to point out that kids in band? Are NOT “band geeks.” A point which Tom will vehemently deny.

So, actually, I was really pleased when the band teacher called me and said that they had went around to all the new 6th graders and had given them a second chance to be in band. Mika said he wanted to play the tuba!

Of course, his favorite part is that he can make a sound like an elephant fart. [insert 12 year old boy giggles here]

Erin was extremely interested in the incredibly interesting noises emanating from this new thing in her house.

Zaya quickly came up with the idea that Erin looking in the tuba should change to Erin being in the tuba. The mom in me was all, “No, we don’t utilize musical instruments in that manner! Cease and desist immediately!” but the Dory in me was all, “Aw, this is gonna be a great picture!”

Which even more quickly devolved into, “Hey, what happens if we put Elmer in there?”

And the answer to that would be, “You have one really freaked out Elmer on your hands.”

And an Elmer NOT shy about voicing his displeasure. He was NOT pleased with the turn of events.

And furthermore, his fluffy butt makes a great mute.

I like the fun house mirror photo op. Big surprise there.

So I’ll have Zaya practicing drums and Mika practicing tuba DAILY. I see a lot of extremely loud noise in my future.

I love it. 🙂

Overheard at Asbee’s Asylum – Home of the Cozy White Coats

(Scene: All Asbee’s are watching a DVD together. And no one is abusing each other. Go figure.)

young son, Mika: Mom, what’s ‘ironic’ mean?

Dory: *thinks about it a moment* Well, it’s kind of hard to explain. … It’s like, when you’re working at your job, and there’s a “No Smoking” sign on the wall when you take your cigarette break.

Mika: *completely confused and bewildered*

Tom: Son, it’s like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife.

Mika: You are both. SO. WEIRD.

Dory: My laptop’s open. Dictionary.com is your friend.

Tom: While you’re at it, look up ‘weird’ and see if our picture is up there.

(End Scene.)

Our children are going to be SO warped.

(FYI… I used to use the name The Dinosaur, or Dino, for the younger son. 1- He’s no longer obsessed with dinosaurs and memorizing entire encyclopedias on The Jurassic Period. 2- I also gave the sons weird names so people can’t google them later and find them here. So I’ll just misspell their names instead from now on. Plus, I never use our real last name on here because I don’t want The GirlBeater googling back here.)