I’m so very sorry. I wish I had been brave enough to come forward.

I’m in total shock.

This could have been me.

I’m ashamed to say that I was with this person for 4 1/2 years. He abused me in every way possible. Then when I finally left him, he stalked me for weeks and threatened (to other people) that he was going to blow my head off with a 9 mil. The cops couldn’t do anything about the stalking or the threat.

I didn’t speak up. I may have spared this poor woman (and only God knows how many others) a world of pain and heartache.

Here’s the screenshot. I’ll put the actual link on Facebook. I don’t want the article linked directly back here.

He’s not welcome here. Obviously.

13 thoughts on “I’m so very sorry. I wish I had been brave enough to come forward.”

  1. Oh, Ness, I’m glad you did get away. I’m glad that they finally got him too…I just wish the punishment fit his crimes. Abuse, in any form, is not a laughing matter and no one should have to experience what any woman had to experience from him.

    Big Hugs!

  2. Babe, do NOT feel sorry or ashamed for what a paralyzing FEAR can do to you!! This man – and ONLY this man – is responsible for his (horrendous) behavior. Hold your head up high, sweet girl. LOVE you.

  3. If we had only known at the time. You know Pat would have done anything to protect you even if the police couldn’t. But it’s over and he finally will pay for his actions. Just remember that you are loved so much by so many.

  4. I was a sexual abuse counselor and a domestic violence counselor for 15 years and I can tell you that the failure is not yours. It’s his failure of integrity, morality, maturity and compassion; and our socio/legal/political system that has failed battered women for decades. It’s also a product of a patriarchal society that has failed women and children, and been complicit in their abuse and oppression, for too long. You empower women on a daily basis, given your compassionate Christianity and your respect for those who live on the margins of our society. There is no blame for you, you didn’t fail at all: you survived and we are all better for it.

  5. I can’t say anything that hasn’t already been said (or at least I can’t say it any better). I’m just glad you got out and moved on, and I’m glad the justice system finally caught up with him.

    –Mary

  6. Hey Dory – I’m just catching up on my blogroll since I finished NaBloPoMo and came across this. I suspect there’s not much I can add to what’s been said before. But you cannot and must not blame yourself for this.

    Speaking as a man, I have to say I’m sometimes ashamed at how some of my gender act. Luckily there are people like Tom around to set an example to us all.

    fbf
    fatboyfat´s last blog post ..Hinterland

  7. What an awful thing for you to go through. Hoping that he
    won’t see the light of day for a long long time. Don’t be
    ashamed-that’s for him. You saved yourself. xoxo

    Dory Reply:

    Sorry, I just found your comment in my spam filter and pulled it out. Thank you for your support. :)

  8. This is a good subject to talk about. Generally when I come
    across these sort of things I like to post them on Digg. This
    article probably won’t do well with that crowd. I will be sure to
    submit something else though.

Comments are closed.