She ain’t no drag… Mama’s got a brand new bag. *trumpets blast*

For most of my girly life (i.e. puberty) I have been on a quest for the perfect bag.

Ladies, I’m sure you can identify. We begin our love affair with purses and they must be small and cute and sequin-y, requiring only space for the cellie and your shiny pink lip gloss, and your teeny tiny wallet with only $17 cash in small bills from baby-sitting that little demon-spawn next door.

Once you begin dating and move into married life, your purse must be a tad larger to accommodate not only the requisite emergency feminine hygiene products, your planner/PDA, and both checkbooks, but the significant other’s sunglasses, etc. as well.

Then you spew offspring and even though they come with a diaper bag, your purse must grow exponentially to contain not only hubby’s rewetting drops and small screwdriver set, but also a couple different rattles and large plastic singing keys; later, a pound of legos and/or a full hotwheels track, a dozen matchbox cars, and three Goldenbooks.

Your bag must be the perfect balance of practicality and style, yet each contender is found wanting in one way or another. This one’s too wide; that one barely holds lipstick and a tampon; this one’s too sparkly; if only that one’s pockets were a little bigger; wait, didn’t Grandma have one similar? and the search marches on. Upscale department stores, garage sales, discount stores, consignment shops, hand-me-downs from tasteful sisters-in-law; each carries the distinct possibility that you may find your consummate handbag.

In my search for my holy grail of satchels, I finally came to the conclusion that I was going to have to make it myself. Ladies, I present to you: The Bag. It boasts 13 pockets outside and 9 pockets inside, and (bonus plan baby!) Dory graces the bag with her cheerful presence.

*angels belt out the Hallelujah Chorus*

It’s not perfect, but it’s as close as I’ve ever come, and I consider it a work in progress. I’ve already made suggestions to myself as to improvements as it gets real-world practice. For instance, instead of button holes, grommets; so as to have the hand cord slide a little smoother. Obviously, it’s not exactly the bag you would pair with a cocktail dress to the Country Club, but for everyday use, it’s the best I’ve ever had. And considering I lack both a cocktail dress and a Country Club membership, I’m not exactly developing an ulcer.

So there’s a fine example of If You Want It Done Right, Do It Yourself.

And now my world has a little more order.

Amen.

Next project: a Pooh quilt for my niece to be. She’s still cookin’. She should be making her debut mid-March.

May take some pictures while I’m at it and show you how I make a quilt. We’ll see. If you’re good.

What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever carried in your purse?

Tawk *ahem* comment amungst comment *ahem* yawselves.

Rip it, roll it, and punch it, dude. Hallelujah! Can I getta witness?!

Author: Dory

Believer. Wife. Mom. Deaf chick. ADD-addled. Photographer. Graphic designer. Blogger. Guano whacknut. Not necessarily in that order.

8 thoughts on “She ain’t no drag… Mama’s got a brand new bag. *trumpets blast*”

  1. I give it six months and there will be something that is a fatal flaw with this bag.

    Did I say that out loud?

    I meant that I’m sure that it will be great and it is undoubtedly the most perfect bag in existence.
    That’s totally what I said and don’t look up there to see that other thing…

  2. I gotta become a purse carrier before I can answer your question. I use a wallet-on-a-string approach…or the old-fashioned “pocket.”

    But I do covet the bags I see in mags. Go figure.

  3. I love the bag.
    I don’t actually carry a purse which will no doubt change once I have kids. I just use a wallet in my back pocket and a mini-knife attached to nail clippers and some chapstick in my front pocket.
    Very nice design on the bag, and I love that you have Dory on it. you should make more and sell them on Etsy.

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